I have a lot of spare time to fill due being off work and mostly housebound. One of my favourite discoveries is audiobooks. For a long time my concentration has been too poor to focus on reading. I end up reading sentences over and over and find it distressing. Then along came audiobooks, someone to read to me. I’ve always found I’ve absorbed information best through listening.
I’ve been mostly listening to short audio books on history especially Old Hollywood history which I adore. Hiweber I have started to listen to Derren Brown ‘Happy’ and it has reihnited my long lost love of philosophy. The book is mainly challenging what it means to be happy through use of various great thinkers from Socrates to more modern philosophers.
It has made me think I have always strove for one day ‘being happy’. However I never thought what happiness meant to me? It is such an abstract concept. Does it mean doing a job I love, having good health, meaningful relationships, wealth, recognition? I have never really thought about it in depth as it felt like something unachievable in the face of chronic physical and mental health problems.
Dwelling on it more it occurs to me a lot of my ideas for happiness are either based on societal constructs or what others in my life are doing. I’d be happy if I got married like her, I’d be happy if I bought a house like them. However would obtaining these milestones make me happy?
There is an inherent sadness in the fleeting nature of human existence. Being happy is seemingly the ultimate goal where as life is inherently challenging and it is not possible to be happy 100% of the time. There are many more emotions to experience and are necessary to experience happiness. You can only know the high when you’ve know the low.
This is not saying I’m going to suddenly live my life in another way. It’s just made me consider what actually would me happy long term? Not the fleeting joy of buying a new product and having it dissipate almost instantaneously. This is the nature of the modern world as happiness seems to be packaged as something that is tangible and can be bought.
What will make me happy in life? Whatever that may be, I must think of it on my terms outside of other’s expectations of a happy life. Hopefully this blog will make you question your own thoughts on happiness and what it means to you.
Laura The Heroine 